Archive for the 'Mommy thoughts' Category


Versatile Armpits and Other Colloquialisms

While changing for bed one night.
Aubrey:   You got BIG armpits!
Me:   [confusedly point to my armpit] I have big armpits?
Aubrey:   No those. [points to my chest]


While at dinner with several family members including my sister-in-law’s little brother Jordan fresh out of Army training.
Aubrey:   You got big armpits.
I giggle thinking she’s telling Jordan he has big boobs that she can see thanks to his ‘stylish’ removal of his t-shirt sleeves.
Jordan:   What Aubrey?
Aubrey:   [points to Jordan’s bicep]
At this point she removes her jacket to show off her own ‘armpits’. When Jordan asks her to flex for him she nonchalantly raises her arm in the classic flexing pose and flips her hair with her hand.
Lord help us.


Following any suggestion Aubrey makes.
Aubrey:   That be idea?


Every weekend morning.
Aubrey:   [whispering] G’morning Mommy.
Me:   [groan and open one eye to see what time it is] G’morning Auby.
Aubrey:   Look! The light is out. [gesturing to the morning sun in the window] That’s why it’s morning time!!


Concerning almost anything new. Objects, places, experiences, etc.
Aubrey: I so eh-cited!!!


Aubrey:   Otay.


Concerning her hair in various circumstances.
Aubrey:   [combing her tangled hair with her fingers] I making my hair byooful Mom. It so byooful?

Grandma:   Come on Aubrey, let’s go take a bath.
Aubery:   But I jus tate a bath last night I did.
Grandma:   Well we take baths in the morning too. Besides your hair [gets cut off by Aubrey raising her hand in exasperation]
Aubrey:   I know. It’s so wyold.

Aubrey:   [while having her hair straightened one morning for school] My hair so warm and soft! But not dis side. It’s jus wyold. You maytit byooful Mom?


Arriving home from work.
Aubrey:   [following big hugs] You miss you durl?


Chocolate milk vs. Milk.
Aubrey:   I wan chotet milt. I no want milt in it. I jus wan chotet milt.
Me:   Aubrey, you have to have milk to make chocolate milk.
Aubrey:   Yeah but I no wan milt. Jus put chotet milt in my tup.

Daddy:   Aubrey, you want some chocolate milk?
Aubrey:   No! You mate milt. Mom mates chotet milt. [apparently the ratio of chocolate syrup to milk is critical]


Concerning death.
Aubrey:   [out of the blue to her day care provider] You mom die?
Lisa:   Yeah she did.
Aubrey:   [after a short moment of silence] It be otay. I getchu a new one.


I Like The Boys

I have told most of my family this story but it’s one of those things I need to get in writing for posterity’s sake. A few weeks ago Bran and I were riding in his truck having a conversation and out of the blue Auby pipes up and says, “Hey Daddy?”
“Yeah Auby?”
“I like the boys.”
“I like boys Daddy.”

Oh lord help us!



Aubrey is going through such an amazing and fun stage of her life right now. Her vocabulary is exploding and she is finally able to put into words the many things going through her head at any given moment. She is also able to make it evident that her memory is AMAZING. It is going on two weeks since I was in LA and she still occasionally asks me when she sees a plane in the sky, “Mom go in a pane?”

On Saturday we took her to the Dinosaurs Unearthed exhibit at Union Station. She was both enthralled and terrified of the entire experience. She had a death grip around my mom’s neck the entire time and if Aubrey felt that her mom or her grandma were getting too close to the moving, growling monsters she was quick to tell us that. “It no eat you Mom! I save you!”

Given her overall quiet and obviously nervous demeanor throughout the entire exhibit I didn’t think we would be doing anything like that again any time soon, however on Sunday night she turns to me out of the blue and says, “I see dinosaurs! You see dinosaurs wif me Mom?” Then again on Monday, in the car on the way to day care she sleepily rubbed her eyes and asked, “We go Yamma’s house?” “No we’re not going to Grandma’s, we going to day care.” “I go see dinosaurs?” It seems the IDEA of dinosaurs is incredibly appealing to her. She appears to have forgotten that pesky REALITY that she’s scared of them.

This morning is what really blew me away.

We’ve been working on getting her back into a routine of some sort. Until recently she has stayed up with us until we were ready for bed and then we all snuggled into the same bed. I know that it is generally frowned upon to let a toddler sleep with their parent but I get so little time with my daughter during the week that quite frankly, I couldn’t care less what some self-important child psychologist author or anyone else thinks. Every child and every parent-child relationship is unique so if my bonding time with my child means she shares/slowly steals my pillow at night then so be it. Tangent aside, we have been working on getting her back to sleeping in her own bed simply because we’re hoping for kiddo number two soon and it will be easier if she is already broken of the habit of sleeping with us by then.

So last night I laid down with Aubrey in her bed just long enough for her to fall asleep. Unfortunately I am physically incapable of staying awake with her slow quiet breathing hypnotizing me. Brandon came in to wake me up around 11:30 and I stumbled into our room to finish the night.

Typically when we attempt this routine, around 5:00 or 6:00 in the morning Aubrey will wake up and make her way into our bed on her own. I didn’t sleep well last night waiting for that to happen, but it didn’t.

After a few dozen passes on the snooze button I got up and got ready for work. As I finished drying my hair I heard Aubrey start crying in her room. When I opened the door, smiling, ready to say ‘Good morning Beautiful!’ I was greeted with a crocodile tear streaked face and an angry exclamation of, “You left! You left me!”

I felt so bad! I tried to convince her that I just stepped out to dry my hair but her expression told me she didn’t believe me.

I got her dressed and we went to the kitchen to get her some chocolate milk, Cheerios and gummy bear vitamins. Generally I have all this prepared for her before I wake her up so she never sees the preparation process. I typically take some cereal and a travel coffee cup full of milk to work in the mornings so when she saw my travel cup next to her cup she says, “What’s that?” “That’s for Mommy’s drink.” “Mommy wan chodit milk?” “Sort of.”

I poured whole milk into her cup and as I was returning it to the fridge to grab skim milk for myself she yells, “Hey! What about you chodit milk Mom?” Talk about observant.

As I was explaining to her that I drink different milk than she does she asks, “Where Daddy?” “Daddy’s still in bed.” “Daddy not in bed!” “Yes he is sweetie.” “No. Daddy not come to bed last night. Daddy go buh bye.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. Her logic was flawless. Daddy, in fact, did not lay down in her bed last night so naturally he could not still be in bed if he was never there to begin with.

What else is going on in that head of hers that I have yet to find out about? With the amount of documentaries she watches with her dad it’s likely something like quantum mechanics and string theory….oh lordy I can’t wait for those conversations!


Broken Heart

Aubrey is an incredible flirt. She has been known to bat her lashes and give coy looks to many cute boys. She has softly pet my step brother-in-law’s arm while giving him her best shy smile and she has even reached out to grab a boy by the arm who was walking past her in a restaurant just to smile and say hi. By the way, SHE’S TWO!

It seems girls not only discover the opposite sex sooner than boys, but our hearts get broken so much sooner too. This video just makes me want to hug this little girl. I can just imagine Aubrey going through heartache like this. How sad and adorably sweet.


A few of my favorite things

As Aubrey has gotten older I find it easier to get more and more wrapped up in my day to day life , work  and other things that weren’t so evident to me when she was an infant. I don’t want to say that the wonder and amazement at the little life Brandon and I created has gone away,  but I find her growing independence has allowed the outside world to creep back into my field of view. When she was an infant I could hold her for hours and just marvel at her little features, the feel of her breathing, her soft scent and the faces she would make as she slept in my arms. Now that she is an active toddler she is free to leave my arms and entertain herself, which in turn widens my gaze to the laundry piling up in the hamper, the dishes needing washed, the grocery lists to make and all the other distractions of life.

Because of this, the moments when she does do something to snap me out of my distracted haze stand out so much more than before. Hearing her voice completely changes my mood and no matter how stressful my day at work may have been, I can’t help but smile when I walk in the door and she happily yells, “Mommy!” as she runs to me. It’s not only her voice and the way she pronounces things that I want to lock away in my memory, but also the genuinely sweet and kind personality inside her.

So many mornings I’m tempted to pull off the the side of the highway on the way to day care when I hear her say with gentle pleading from the back seat, “Mom, hode [hold] you?”

Before every bath in the midst of her excitement to get in the water, she never fails to give me a tight hug around the neck and a kiss before climbing into the bubbles. With each hug she gives she does an emphatic grunt to show how tight she is squeezing and every kiss is accompanied by sound effects. “MmmmmAH!”

Her heartbreaking wails of, “Mommy nigh nigh!” on the nights when she wants me to lay down in her bed with her. And on the nights that I do she can’t seem to get close enough as she does her best to pull my head onto her pillow saying, “Mom o’er [over].”

The unfailing politeness as she thanks Brandon and I for everything from juice to kisses. “Ahn you Mom. Ahn you Dah-ee.” Or her persistent reminding when she feels that we have forgotten to give her her due thanks. “Ahn you Auby,” over and over until we say it at least once. And her mastering of the word ‘please’ so that with a soft request of, “Toontoona peesh Dah-ee,” Brandon, who swore he would never be wrapped around her finger, will turn off his documentaries and search the channels for cartoons.

Her desire to help with every task no matter how much more work her help will create for me. “Auby hewp.Auby hewp too!”

The genuine concern when she realizes someone is missing from her presence and the way she cocks her head and holds her palms up as she says, “Dah-ee go? Mom go?” And the excitement that comes when the missing person returns. “Dah-ee he-ur! Hi Dah-ee!”

Her sense of fairness and generosity when she insists that if I give her fruit snacks or a pudding cup that I must give one to Brandon as well because she knows he enjoys them too. “Dah-ee one too?” She also uses this concept to bargain for accompaniment when she is afraid she will be the only one doing something. “Mom nigh nigh too?” “Mom buh bye too?”

She is growing up so fast and learning new words and phrases almost hourly. I’m sure it’s only a matter of weeks before her pronunciation improves and she gradually loses the adorable toddler vocabulary in exchange for longer phrases and before long I’ll be hearing, “Mom, can I borrow the car?” instead of, “Mom up? Mom hode you?”

It’s a horrible curse that when we’re young we strive so hard to grow up as fast as we can and when those short years of innocence are over we’re left wondering where time went and wishing against reason that it slows down as we watch our own children racing through childhood as well. I’m sure most everyone has heard the pleas of  our predecessors urging us to slow down and enjoy each day for what it is rather than counting the seconds until tomorrow, but like each generation before us we commit the same mistakes letting those words of advice drift past us like a stranger in a crowd we have no desire to know. I already know I will beg Aubrey to slow down, just as I know she will only half hear my words as she pushes forward toward adulthood at a pace too fast for my liking, but I hope that she can look back on her life with satisfaction at a full and happy childhood.


Auby Tyoooo

I started asking Aubrey how old she was about a week before her birthday to get her prepped and she quickly picked up on the fact that when anyone asked, “Aubrey how old are you?” the correct response was to hold up both of her index fingers and declare, “Auby tyooo.” Now she likes to try it out on everything.

Mommy tyoooo.

Dodgie [doggy] tyoooo.

Two nights ago I laid in bed with her while she practiced displaying the number two on one hand at a time. It took some help from me to get an effective peace sign style number two out of her uncoordinated fingers but once she had it she held it until she finally gave up and fell asleep while I stroked her hair.

While she’s still a remarkably well behaved child, it’s almost as if someone flipped a switch on her second birthday and I am seeing the evolution of a little attitude forming. She still gives up on her tantrums in record time because she has learned that mom and dad never give in, but now there is a little something extra in her temper that wasn’t there before. It’s hard to put my finger on it but there has definitely been a change. The biggest of which is her more frequent (yet still playful) use of the word, “no.” She says “no” just to say it now. She has reached the age where it is absolutely vital to her to assert her independence and autonomy by  displaying her ability to defy anything on a whim. She doesn’t have to have a good reason to turn down a bite of a delicious peanut butter and nutella sandwich other than the simple fact that she can. Of course she changes her mind moments later once she is satisfied that she has some control over her surroundings.

I know that once she begins being more adamant about her desires it will wear on my nerves a bit. I’d be lying if I said that it wouldn’t. However, it is still amazing to watch her sense of self evolve so rapidly. It was only yesterday when I could tell her what she was going to wear, eat, and do and she complied without question. It’s nice to see her developing a sense of self that I hope will continue to carry her along a path to a confident, assertive, well rounded young woman some day.


The Princess and The Pee

*Note – this will be the long rambling post of an incredibly proud parent.

Aubrey’s day care provider has had a vacation planned for November 13th through November 21st for several months now and the plan was always to make an attempt at potty training while I worked from home with Aubrey. She turned 21 months on the 14th and everything I had read said that kids weren’t really ready to start trying until after age 2. I wasn’t nervous about trying early though. I have had a clear plan in my head of exactly how I was going to tackle this particular milestone for quite a while. I was also prepared for failure. I figured if she wasn’t ready for this step, we would just try later. I knew it would happen eventually.

I bought Aubrey a “Princess Potty” several months ago and it has been in her bathroom all this time so she could get used to seeing it and hearing the word ‘potty.’ Every time I went to the restroom I would say, “Mommy’s going to go potty, do you want to come?” Aubrey would almost always excitedly follow me into the bathroom where she would sit on her potty chair, lid up or lid down, it didn’t matter, while she waited for me to finish. Sometimes she would even pantomime wiping, even though her pants were always up.

I took Friday off of work, and if you glanced at the calendar you may have noticed that I did in fact decide to attempt this endeavor on Friday the 13th. I woke to Aubrey yelling, “Mama! Mama!” from her crib in an effort to tell me that I had clearly slept in and she was going to be late to day care. I slid out of bed around 8 a.m. and Aubrey and I had cereal while we planned out our day. I told her how we were going to have 10 whole uninterrupted mom-baby days and that we were going to learn to use the potty. She seemed rather indifferent as she munched on her Apple Jacks.

After breakfast we got dressed, kissed Brandon and wished him a good day at work and then Aubs and I headed off to the grocery store to get all our provisions for the day.

We stocked up on 4 different kinds of juice and plenty of salty, thirst inducing snacks. Then I vacuumed up all of the dog hair and dust bunnies, rolled up the living room rug and laid out the ‘throne.’

In front of the t.v. where I put in The Chronicles of Narnia.

We have a definite advantage in the fact that we don’t have carpet anywhere upstairs other than in our bedrooms. That’s mainly thanks to one of my pregnancy hormone induced nesting binges in which Brandon came home to me removing large hunks of carpet with a box knife and heaving them into the front yard.

Once I had everything in place including a Costco sized helping of paper towels and disinfectant wipes…

I stripped Aubrey down to nothing.

She ran the house naked for the entire day and each time she would start to pee on the floor I would try my best to get her to her potty chair before she was done, all while telling her in an encouraging tone what she was doing. Ex: “Aubrey you’re pottying! That’s good! Potty goes in your potty chair.”

Once or twice I managed to get her to the chair in time to get a few drops in there. I didn’t take my eyes off her for the majority of the day, with the exception of my own calls of nature. It was on one such occasion that she followed me into the bathroom and wanted to play with the light switch like she usually does, but she was missing her usual step stool/potty chair with the lid down. She went back into the living room to retrieve it and I could hear her, what I thought, struggling with the chair. Suddenly she burst into hysterical crying. I called to her to come back to me and tell me what was wrong. She thundered down the hall, stopped in the doorway to the bathroom, gave me her most distressed, tear soaked look, pointed back at the living room and declared, “POOP!” I was shocked. I asked her if she had pooped and she again said, “Yeah. Poop!”

Sure enough she had gone right on the floor and she was quite upset about it. I calmly told her that it was okay and that next time it needed to go in the potty chair. She seemed suspicious that something like that could go in her chair so she simply responded with several proclamations of, “Ew.”

Overall I didn’t consider the day a failure or a success. It was just a step in the right direction.

Day 2, Saturday. Aubrey had one accident on the floor as she was declaring, “Poddy!” and left a trail of it all the way to her chair where she sat down, albeit a bit too late. The second time however was a resounding success. I was distracted by the television and came back to reality as Aubrey stepped in front of me, again declaring her intentions by yelling, “Poddy!” She sat down and went! I was so excited I cried. Not horrific sobs of course, just proud tearing up.

Later that day during my shower I brought Aubs and her potty chair into the restroom with me. She was haphazardly removing everything that wasn’t nailed down from underneath the vanity, as usual, while I was washing my hair. Suddenly I heard the musical chimes from her chair, I peaked out to see her proudly sitting on her chair. She smiled at me, kicked her legs and said, “Poddy!”

Day 3, Sunday. More pottying success. Brandon had to leave last minute to fly to Louisville for work and shortly after he left I found myself sucked into a movie I’ve seen a dozen times. Next thing I know Aubrey comes streaking down the hall, not saying anything, and sat on her chair. A few seconds later I was brought back to reality by her yelling, “Ew!” Lo and behold, she had figured out that number 2 really does go in her chair!

Day 4, Monday. Not one accident! She has made it to her chair for both potty and poo. I am just glowing I’m so proud of her! Now what the heck am I going to do with the giant, unopened box of diapers I bought last week? What a good problem to have!

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